How do we Process Life?
Teaching from Brad Bigney, Grace Fellowship Church, www.graceky.org
Proverbs 4:23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.
Each topic below aligns with the chart above. The examples given below will be of a normal human being, who has not been taught how to think using God’s word and putting it into practice. The purpose for this exercise is to help us be aware of the fact that our thinking has not normally been that of a person who is obedient to God’s word in every aspect of life. The goal is to be transformed into the likeness of Jesus Christ, who is perfect in his love and compassion and judgment, etc.…
It all begins with the circumstances we face each and every day.
Circumstances– Stuff happens to us everyday!
- People sin against us
- People do not live up to our expectations
- We experience a sickness
- It rains on our picnic, etc.…
which leads to:
Thinking– The Bible teaches that we ‘think’ something about each event whether we are aware of it or not. We are thinking and talking to ourselves about what happens to us all the time at an incredible rate throughout each day:
- This is not fair
- I deserve better than this
- I can’t handle this
- I can fix this, etc.…
This thinking is the control center, the motive, the will of a person. The Bible speaks of the ‘heart’ and ‘mind’ interchangeably in many places. The ‘heart’ or ‘mind’ is the control center of our life.
Proverbs 23:7 “…..as a man thinks in his heart so is he.”
Proverbs 4:23 “Guard your heart with all diligence, for out of it flows the issues of life.”
2 Corinthians 10:5 “Casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.”
Romans 12:2 “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
Ephesians 4:22-24 “That you put off concerning your conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in righteousness and true holiness.”
Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brethren, whatever thing are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report……think on these things.”
The Battle is in our mind/ heart. It is a battle for our thoughts and beliefs.
Emotions– Based on what we are thinking and believing, we begin to experience emotions.
- Fear
- Anxiety
- Anger
- Depression
- Envy
Our feelings do not erupt out of a vacuum. Our emotions/feelings flow out of our thinking and beliefs.
In the Bible, emotions are often associated with the “heart.” The term “heart” in biblical language refers not just to the physical organ, but symbolically to the center of human thought, will, and emotions. Here are some key points:
- The Heart as the Seat of Emotions
-Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” This verse highlights the heart as the source of life’s issues, including emotions.
– Jesus also speaks about the heart as the origin of emotions and actions in Matthew 15:18-19: “But the things that come out of a person’s mouth come from the heart, and these defile them. For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.”
- The Heart and Love
– The greatest commandment, according to Jesus, involves the heart: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind” (Matthew 22:37). Here, the heart is directly connected to the emotion of love.
- The Heart and Sadness
– In Psalm 34:18, it says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” This reflects the connection between the heart and emotions of sadness or grief.
- The Heart and Joy
– Proverbs 17:22 states, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” This verse ties the emotion of joy to the heart, showing how it impacts a person’s overall well-being.
- The Heart and Fear
– Deuteronomy 20:3 mentions, “Do not be fainthearted or afraid; do not panic or be terrified by them.” Here, fear is associated with the heart, and the command is to not let the heart be ruled by fear.
In summary, the Bible often speaks of the heart as the source of emotions, making it a central part of one’s spiritual and emotional life. The heart is seen as the place where thoughts, feelings, and desires reside, influencing both actions and attitudes.
Actions– Based on what we are feeling, we begin to make choices in our heart and take action. It is very difficult (though not impossible) to act contrary to our emotions. Most people struggle to rise above feelings.
- We pull away from things when we are afraid.
- We neglect our duties when we are walking in our flesh.
- We avoid a person when we are angry with them.
- We speak harshly when we are angry.
Think-Emote-Act (T.E.A.)- Over a period of time we build habits. We begin to automatically think, emote, and act in the same way that we always have. We have probably been doing this from childhood. Notice that this is based on our thinking/beliefs. If we don’t change our thinking and beliefs, we will emote and respond in the same way as we have always done.
Character– The habitual way that we respond to people and circumstances becomes to be seen as our character. We make excuses for ourselves and others because of our personality or character. This is often referred to as the victim mentality.
I am a/an;
- Angry person
- Anxious person
- Depressed person
- Ambitious person
- Lazy person
- Outspoken person
- Shy person
- Slow learner, etc.…
Our Character has become our habitual way of thinking in our heart. Do you know someone who resists change because they are convinced that their character is just “the way it is”? That they can’t change or that they shouldn’t have to change because “that’s the way God made me”. The simple fact is that just because it’s the way you have always reacted, doesn’t mean you can’t change. God is in the business of changing hearts. He calls us to be renewed in the spirit of our mind (Ephesians 4:23). In fact to not be seeking change is to be in opposition to God’s work in every believer. Let’s look at second Corinthians 318 to further explainThis ideal of our character in the flash being transformed to a godly character.
2 Corinthians 3:18 (NIV)”And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”
2 Corinthians 3:18 is part of a larger passage where the Apostle Paul contrasts the old covenant, represented by Moses and the Law, with the new covenant established through Christ. Paul refers to the experience of Moses when he met with God on Mount Sinai and his face shone with God’s glory, so much so that he had to cover it with a veil when speaking to the Israelites (Exodus 34:29-35). In this passage, Paul uses the imagery of the veil to illustrate the difference between the old covenant, which was glorious but fading, and the new covenant, which is far more glorious and lasting.
“And we all, who with unveiled faces…”Paul begins by emphasizing that under the new covenant, all believers have “unveiled faces.” This signifies that, unlike the Israelites under the old covenant who could not fully perceive God’s glory due to the veil, believers in Christ can now see God’s glory clearly and directly. The veil, which symbolizes the barrier that once existed between God and humanity, has been removed through Christ. In this unveiled state, there is no longer a separation between God and His people; believers now have direct access to God’s presence and can fully experience His glory.
“…contemplate the Lord’s glory…”The word “contemplate” here suggests both beholding and reflecting. Believers are called to fix their gaze upon the Lord’s glory, to meditate on it, and to let it fill their minds and hearts. This contemplation is not just a passive observation but an active engagement with the divine presence. The glory of the Lord that Paul speaks of is the character, nature, and majesty of God as revealed in Christ. As believers behold the glory of the Lord, they are spiritually transformed by what they see.
“…are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory…”
This part of the verse describes the transformative process that occurs when believers contemplate the Lord’s glory. The Greek word for “transformed” is metamorphoō*, from which we get the word “metamorphosis.” It suggests a profound, fundamental change, not just an outward alteration. As believers behold the glory of God, they are progressively being changed into His image. This transformation is continuous, marked by “ever-increasing glory,” indicating that the process of becoming like Christ is ongoing and will continue to grow and intensify throughout the believer’s life.
This transformation into God’s image is a restoration of what was marred by sin. In Genesis, humans were created in the image of God, but that image was distorted through sin. Through Christ, believers are being restored to that original image, reflecting God’s character more fully.
“…which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.”
Finally, Paul identifies the source of this transformation: the Lord, who is the Spirit. This underscores that the transformation is not something believers accomplish by their own efforts; it is the work of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit empowers, guides, and sanctifies believers, enabling them to grow in Christlikeness. The Spirit is both the source and the agent of the transformation, ensuring that the process is rooted in divine power and not human effort.
2 Corinthians 3:18 has profound theological implications for understanding Christian sanctification and the role of the Holy Spirit in the life of a believer. It teaches that sanctification is a dynamic, ongoing process of becoming more like Christ, driven by the Holy Spirit. The verse also reinforces the idea that the Christian life is not static; it is marked by continuous growth in holiness and spiritual maturity as one contemplates the glory of God.
Moreover, this passage emphasizes the accessibility of God’s glory to all believers, not just a select few. Under the new covenant, every believer has the privilege of direct access to God and the opportunity to be transformed into His likeness. The “ever-increasing glory” points to the ultimate hope of final glorification, where believers will fully reflect God’s image in eternity.
In practical terms, this verse encourages believers to intentionally spend time contemplating the Lord’s glory—through prayer, worship, Scripture reading, and meditating on God’s character. As they do so, they can trust that the Holy Spirit is at work in them, transforming them into the image of Christ. This transformation is both a personal and communal experience, as Paul speaks of “we all,” indicating that this is a shared journey of growing in Christlikeness together as the body of Christ.
Believers are also reminded to rely on the Holy Spirit for this transformation, recognizing that it is not something they can achieve by sheer willpower but through the Spirit’s work in their lives. The promise of being transformed “with ever-increasing glory” offers hope and encouragement, especially in times of struggle, that God is faithfully at work, bringing them closer to the image of His Son.
This teaching is necessary because you will always run into people that believe that their emotions are uncontrollable. They get angry and can not help it. They see themselves as victims of their own emotions. This is not true and a lie from the pit of hell. Our emotions can be controlled but it requires change at the heart level of their thinking and beliefs.
This teaching is also necessary because you will always run into people that hide behind the shield of their character. They believe incorrectly that character is unchangeable and everyone else should just put up with them.
Main Points :
- Emotions and Behavior are Controllable by changing beliefs
- No believer should ever say they can not change
- The battle is in our thinking and beliefs
- To believe Truth or Lies? That’s our choice
- God is in the business of changing hearts
Homework Explanation: How do we Process Life
This homework is to help you be aware of your thinking/ Beliefs as they pertain to the emotional response of becoming irritated or frustrated or angry.
When you recognize that you have become irritated, frustrated or angry.
- Note the circumstance that “produced” the emotional response.
- Now work backwards to examine the thinking/ Belief that you hold that the emotion flowed from.
- Extra points: Is your thinking Truth or a Lie according to God’s Word?
Example 1:
- I became irritated when waiting in traffic can begin to blow my horn.
- Lie: I believe that I should not be inconvenienced by having to wait in traffic.
- Truth: I was never promised to not be inconvenienced.
Example 2:
- I became frustrated when my friends didn’t immediately see the wisdom of my suggestion. “they disagreed.”
- Lie: I believe that I deserve to be respected at all times.
- Truth: I was never promised to be respected at all times. Christ was not respected at all times, why should I expect it?
Example 3:
- I got mad when no one complimented me for how I served on the setup/ cleanup team.
- Lie: I believe that I should receive approval from others.
- Truth: I was never promised approval from others. Christ was not approved of by many. Why should I expect it?
Use this list of possible beliefs to help with your homework:
I Deserve:______________
- To be loved
- To be accepted
- To be understood
- To be respected
- To be served
- To never hurt or be disappointing by others
- To have personal preference accommodated at all times
- To be viewed as competent
- To be approved of
- To belong
- To be held in high regard
- To be satisfied
- To be safe and secure
- To be comfortable
- To never be alone
- To have peace
- To you have a trouble free, pain-free life
- To have someone exposed
- To be treated fairly
Homework: How do we Process Life (Journaling)
Click on the following link and fill out the information on your journaling form. Apply it to a situation that you have experienced in the past or one that you are experiencing now. Once you have completed your journal page hit submit. A completed journaling page will be emailed directly to you soon after you have completed the form. Please be very honest and all of your answers!
review these answers with your counselor or someone that you can trust to hold you accountable.